Would you consider yourself a people pleaser?
I am a recovering people pleaser.
Today, let’s take a peek at what people-pleasing really is.
And how it can affect your weight.
People pleasers pretty readily admit that they are in fact people pleasers.
But if you're a people pleaser, let me tell you it's not as noble as what you might think.
You probably think that people-pleasing is about pleasing other people.
Doing things for other people to make them feel good. In spite of how it feels for you.
But if you are people-pleasing, what you are really doing is manipulating how another person feels; because you don't feel comfortable being honest.
And by pretending that you're ok with what's going on, you present yourself in a better light.
Let me give you an example.
How many times have you eaten Aunty Margaret’s dry old sponge just to make her happy? And at face value, that seems like a pretty nice thing to do. You wanted to please her.
But now every time you go to catch up with Aunty Margret she’s always got that old cake for you.
So now every time you think of calling Aunty Margaret, you think about that old cake she’s going to make you that you are going to have to eat.
So then you stop calling Aunty Margaret because you know when you call, she's going to invite you over and she'll be making that cake again.
The next thing you know, you haven't seen poor old Aunty Margret for a couple of years all because you didn't want to eat that damn dry old sponge because you didn't have the balls to say, no thanks Aunty Margret, I don't eat cake.
People-pleasing; it's no good.
And think about it from Aunty Margaret's point of view. She's probably thinking every time you call, ‘damn I have to make that bloody sponge cake again.’
It's a lose-lose situation.
People-pleasing makes you creepy.
You're hard to be around and you're exhausting.
You don't make decisions and it's hard to pin you down.
As a recovering people pleaser - let me tell you - it's worth giving it up.
This is what you gain:
Being able to say no to someone from a place of love is knowing how to stand in your personal power.
It establishes who you are as a person
And it builds trust and establishes authentic relationships.
You get to be you, and the people around you can relax - because they know that you are going to tell it like it is.
And you stop eating terrible sponges and you stayfriends with Aunty Margaret.
Win - win.
If you would like to talk 1:1 with me about losing weight. I invite you to book at obligation free 25 minute consult conversation with me. There comes a time in a woman's life when she just has to get it done.
I can take you there. https://mareewhite.as.me/consultcall